My Response to "23 things to do instead of getting engaged before 23"

I had seen this blog pop up on my newsfeed a few times in the past few days so I decided to read it. As of a few days ago it had 2.3 million hits and I imagine it is much higher by now. If you haven’t read it you can find it HERE. I read it, thought  about it for a day, came back and read it again, and then decided I would write a response to it. 

I think it struck a chord with me because I am in the same phase of life as her, but as I read through her thoughts on marriage, singleness, religion, and things to do before she “settles down” I hurt for her. I hurt for her and so many in our generation who believe the same thing she does. She summarizes it nicely with this statement, “But then I look at my life, my relationships, and my future… and I realize that, I’m f-ing awesome.  It literally isn’t me, it’s them.” This is the thought that our generation is consumed with  – that as individuals we are awesome and it’s everyone around us causing the bad things to happen and messing things up for us.  The problem couldn’t lie within us because we are “f-ing awesome.” Sure, there are some little things in life that we should change about ourselves, and that’s why we make new years resolutions, but for the most part we are perfect human beings. This is what so many people in the millennial generation believe.

My question to Ms. Vanessa Elizabeth and everyone else in the same place as her is “Do you think you will finally find satisfaction after your 23 things are done?”Will you finally be at a point where you can settle down? Or will you keep searching for something that brings complete satisfaction in your life?" I can tell you right now that no matter how many of those you cross off your list, and after you have completed everything off a "46 things to do before you are 46" list that there will still be a huge void in your life. Because the truth is you are not awesome and neither am I.  I believe that deep down people know that they are not perfect and they are searching frantically for anything that will give them meaning. I get it, you have grown up in a world where music and movies tell you that love will give you satisfaction, school tells you that your career will give you satisfaction, and society tells you that money and possessions will give you satisfaction. If you just chase one of these enough your life will be fulfilled.

Here is where the challenge lies as we try to preach the gospel to our generation. First, we have to show the Ms. Vanessa Elizabeths of the world that instead of being perfect they are sinners in desperate, desperate need of a Savior as we all are. Second, the #1 item on any resolution/to-do/bucket list should be to bring glory to God in all things. If that is first place in your life then you will discover the satisfaction that you are so desperately trying to find. Paul said it so simply in Philippians when he said, “For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.”

Right after the "23 Things" article came out many other bloggers jumped on the chance to write a response about how wonderful marriage is and that the writer had the wrong view on it. The secret to a lasting and fulfilling marriage isn’t whether you get married before or after 23 but whether or not Christ is at the center of it. The most defining moment of our lives isn’t something we can cross off a list but what Christ did on the cross.  

For Ms. Vanessa Elizabeth and everyone in the same place as her I pray they will find the truth.  For us as Christians I pray that we will not get caught up in the things of this world but will whole-heartedly pursue Christ. Sir Francis Drake says it so well in his prayer. Even though I have posted it before it is worth reposting.

Disturb us, Lord, when

We are too pleased with ourselves,


When our dreams have come true


Because we dreamed too little,


When we arrived safely


Because we sailed too close to the shore.

Disturb us, Lord,

When
with the abundance of things we possess


We have lost our thirst


For the waters of life;


Having fallen in love with life,


We have ceased to dream of eternity


And in our efforts to build a new earth,


We have allowed our vision


Of the new Heaven to dim.

Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,


To venture on wilder seas


Where storms will show Your mastery;


Where losing sight of land,


We shall find the stars.

We ask you to push back


The horizons of our hopes;


And to push back the future


In strength, courage, hope, and love.

Easter

Over 2000 years ago a man hung on a cross. Many had been crucified before him and there would be many more after him, but there something drastically different about this crucifixion. My Lord, my God, my Savior, the Messiah was crucified that day. As He hung on the cross He bore the full wrath God for every single sin and failure in my life. Then three days later He rose again because He had conquered death. Now one day I will be with Him for all of eternity because of the finished work of Christ on the cross. 

This is the story of Easter and it is one that I have heard hundreds of times in my life, but as I sit here this morning I am still amazed.  "I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me trustworthy, appointing me to his service. Even though I was once a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man, I was shown mercy because I acted in ignorance and unbelief.  The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly, along with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.  But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen." 1 Timothy 1:12-17. Celebrating Easter reminds us of who we were, what Christ did on the cross, and who we are now because of it. Through faith in Him and His grace poured out on us we are:

Redeemed

Declared righteous

Holy before Him

Made new

Forgiven

Loved

And the list goes on and on. 

I hope you have heard these truths many times in your life as I have, but I always need to be reminded of them. As we celebrate Easter tomorrow I pray that we would overflow with thankfulness because our debt has been paid. Let us be people who are always reminding each other of the gospel and live lives that are glorifying and pleasing to God. Happy Easter.

On a hill far away, stood an old rugged Cross

The emblem of suff'ring and shame

And I love that old Cross where the dearest and best

For a world of lost sinners was slain

So I'll cherish the old rugged Cross

Till my trophies at last I lay down

I will cling to the old rugged Cross

And exchange it some day for a crown

Oh, that old rugged Cross so despised by the world

Has a wondrous attraction for me

For the dear Lamb of God, left his Glory above

To bear it to dark Calvary

In the old rugged Cross, stain'd with blood so divine

A wondrous beauty I see

For the dear Lamb of God, left his Glory above

To pardon and sanctify me

To the old rugged Cross, I will ever be true

Its shame and reproach gladly bear

Then He'll call me some day to my home far away

Where his glory forever I'll share

Tune My Heart to Sing Thy Grace

I wish I blogged more. Blogging is a way of focusing my thoughts and really trying to put down in words what God has been teaching me in the last few weeks or months. In the end it doesn't matter if anyone reads my posts because it is still a helpful thing for me to do. I also really enjoy reading other blogs and seeing how God is working in other's lives. As I read I see other's struggles and hardships as wells as times of joy and rejoicing. I am encouraged by seeing their walk and it gives an opportunity to pray for them in specific ways that I wouldn't know otherwise. The other day I was going through the various blogs that I read and I came across a link to a prayer from "The Valley of Vision." I have not read the book to know if I would recommend it or not, but this one prayer in the book fit perfectly with various things I have been dealing with the last few months. Day after day I have been going back and praying through this prayer because it focuses my mind on Christ's finished work and gives me the larger perspective on the trials I face. Every stanza is rich and full of truth. I hope you have the time to go through it and refocus on who you are in Christ. I pray you have a great week that is centered on bringing glory and praise to our King. 

Holy Lord,

I have sinned times without number,

and been guilty of pride and unbelief,

of failure to find Thy mind in Thy Word,

of neglect to seek Thee in my daily life.

My transgressions and short-comings

present me with a list of accusations,

but I bless Thee that they will not stand against me,

for all have been laid on Christ.

Go on to subdue my corruptions,

and grant me grace to live above them.

Let not the passions of the flesh nor lustings

of the mind bring my spirit into subjection,

but do Thou rule over me in liberty and power.

I thank Thee that many of my prayers have been refused.

I have asked amiss and do not have,

I have prayed from lusts and been rejected,

I have longed for Egypt and been given a wilderness.

Go on with Thy patient work,

answering ‘no’ to my wrongful prayers,

and fitting me to accept it.

Purge me from every false desire,

every base aspiration,

everything contrary to Thy rule.

I thank Thee for Thy wisdom and Thy love,

for all the acts of discipline to which I am subject,

for sometimes putting me into the furnace

to refine my gold and remove my dross.

No trial is so hard to bear as a sense of sin.

If Thou shouldst give me choice

to live in pleasure and keep my sins,

or to have them burnt away with trial,

give me sanctified affliction.

Deliver me from every evil habit,

every accretion of former sins,

everything that dims the brightness of Thy grace in me,

everything that prevents me taking delight in Thee.

Then I shall bless Thee, God of Jeshurun,

for helping me to be upright.

– The Valley of Vision

Ruin My Life

2012… It had some great moments and memories and it had some very hard times. To write just about the natural disasters that happened locally and nationally would take quite a while. Or to write about the terrible tragedies that took so many lives this year would also take quite a while. I could also write for a very long while on God’s faithfulness, provision, protection, healing, and so many more things in this past year. Everyone has had different moments of greatness and sorrow in 2012, but those times are in the past and are only memories now.  Tuesday begins a new year, a new blank slate to be filled with the twists and turns of life. If I had taken a guess at what my life would look like right now at the beginning of last year it would have been very far off, but then again I think every year is like that.  We can try to take an educated guess on the future based on our work situation, friendships, where we want to be, etc. but there are so many factors we can never account for.  God is faithfully in control of our lives and brings different events into our lives to mold and shape us. Many times the events that happen in life leave us with no human explanation to why it happened, but we can take comfort in knowing that we serve a God who is sovereign over all things.

I  have the privilege of helping lead worship at my church on New Year’s Eve this year.  During practice this week we decided to do a song that I hadn’t heard for a long time, but ever since we practiced it I can’t stop thinking about it. The song is Ruin Me and the verse and chorus are:

Woe to me I am unclean

A sinner found in Your presence

I see you seated on Your throne

Exalted, Your Glory surrounds You

Now the plans that I have made

Fail to compare when I see your glory

Ruin my life the plans I have made

Ruin desires for my own selfish gain

Destroy the idols that have taken Your place

'Till its You alone I live for,

You alone I live for

The verse is taken out of Isaiah 6 where Isaiah sees the Lord seated on the throne. When Isaiah catches a glimpse into the full glory of the Lord he fully realizes how sinful and unrighteous he truly is.  He realizes that his life is meaningless unless it is spent bringing glory to God. Towards the end of the passage Isaiah says, “Here am I, Send me!” In other words it is a total surrender of the plans he had made for his life that were selfish gain.

If only we fully grasped God’s holiness and righteousness compared to our inadequacy we would have the same reaction Isaiah had when he saw the Lord, “Woe to me, for I am ruined!” All of our selfish ways and plans would be brought to light and we would see how dishonoring they are.

The chorus of the song is prayer that all the things in our lives that our not pleasing in God’s sight would be removed. That the way we plan our days, weeks, and years would no longer be focused on achieving our own gains, but first and foremost about knowing God more and making Him known. My prayer is that 2013 would be a year marked by us throwing off the things that so easily entangle us and running the race set before us fixing our eyes on Jesus. (Hebrews 12:1-3)

Be Still

Be still… What a concept in today’s environment of information attacking us all the time. Even while I write this my phone keeps going off, I have emails coming in and people around me that want to talk. We are surrounded by distractions almost every moment of every day. It is hard to carry on a conversation with somebody without one of you being distracted by something. With everything today coming in short bits of information we are loosing the ability to sit and focus on something in depth. Also with the high speed in which we can access information we are losing the ability to wait for anything.  If we want something we can order it, download it, buy it, sync it, or search it, and have it delivered right now and there is no waiting involved. Sure this transition to faster and faster consumer goods and information may make our life easier, but it can have serious consequences when we have that mentality in our Christian walk.  The Christian life is not about instant fixes on areas that we are lacking, but rather a lifetime of consistently seeking after the heart of God and drawing near to Him. Drawing close to God requires more than tweet sized bites of scripture and a quick prayer before we eat. It requires a heart that yearns for Christ.

I believe few have understood what it means to be in constant community with the Father as well as David did.  The psalms are full of his yearning and pleading with God to be his guide and deliverer through life, because He understood with out Him his life is not worth living.  He writes in Psalm 37:7 “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.” We are so used to not having to wait on anything that this can almost come across as a strange concept. Moses told the Israelites in Exodus 14:14 “The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” My first instinct in the situation would be to try and do something on my own power. My life is in danger and you are telling me to just wait and be vulnerable to whatever may come? The Egyptians who enslaved them for so many years were chasing after them and the Lord’s command to the Israelites was to be still and watch as He fought for them.

The same God who parted the red sea, who protected Paul from the venomous snake, who delivered David from Saul, who hid Elijah away from the prophets of Baal, this God is the same source of strength and deliverance for us today when we trust in Him. “Be still and know that I am God,” He commands us. Be still and know that He is the heavenly Father who loves to bless His children. Be still and know that His love is relentless and unchanging. Be still and know that He takes our feeble efforts and uses them to advance His kingdom. Be still and know that He heals the broken hearted. Be still and know the He gives strength to the weak and courage to the faint of heart. Be still and know that His grace is enough. Be still because He is worthy to receive honor and glory forever and ever. This is the God that we serve and who desires us trust Him so much that we stop trying to do things in our own power and in our own way and rely on his timing and his perfect plan.

I pray that in our busy lives that are filled with distractions we would come before our Savior and be still because He is worthy.

“Lord, I want to yearn for You

I want to burn with passion

Over You

And only You”

- Shane and Shane